Thursday, July 13, 2006

(Last) Week in Review, Part Deux

Names of babysitting hoodlums may have been altered to protect the innocent.

After making a few minor pit stops Kristen, Reagan, Dory (the car) and I headed out. We were packed to utter capacity and even had to leave some things behind. Driving to Tulsa was a breeze. We talked (and sang) the whole way. It's funny. Kristen and I have known each other for 20 some odd years and we have NEVER roadtripped. Never. Not even once! So this was definately an experience we will not soon forget.

To recap, Kristen and I were going to Tulsa to babysit. That's right. The three WONDERFUL children I watch on Friday nights were supposed to be at a family reunion but everyone thought the kids would all be bored to tears at the scheduled family dinner. Wouldn't we all? So, everyone was arranging for their own babysitters. The family got Kristen and I a hotel room and were paying us to boot. Well, we arrived about 6 hours prior to our rendeavous and were grabbing a bite to eat before heading to the Jenks Aquarium when I received a phone call. "Do you mind too terribly much watching two more kids? They're 3 & 6." Honestly, I didn't care all that much. a)Kristen was there to help me. b)they were the same age as the other kids c)they were going to pay really, really well. We agreed...Okay, I agreed and then filled Kristen in. We went to see the fishies and had a pretty good time. It really was fun but not quite what I was expecting. For the price you paid to get in, it wasn't all that fascinating. There were lots of great things to see, but not much fun for a 2 year old. HINT, HINT to any handsome, available, straight men...this would be a great date spot. BECAUSE, less than a mile from the Aquarium is this idealic little shopping area known as the Riverwalk. It's right on the Arkansas River and has the cutest shops and restaurants. One was called the Melting Pot and was a fondu restaurant!! How cool is that?! There was also great music playing, gorgeous fountains...Great.Date.Spot. :) After some much needed shopping time, a little ice cream from The Marble Slab and some running amok in the fountain, we decided it was time for a swim. The hotel had a great little pool. We swam for a bit and met some really nice people in the process. After our dip, FOOD was needed. We went back to our Riverwalk and ate at this huge mexican restaurant called Los Cabos. Never again. Not sure if it was really the food there, but Kristen and I were both up sick all night. It could have very well been the stress of babysitting, or perhaps we had been invaded by some demon (explanation to follow).

After dinner, we were walking back to our car when we see people flying through the air. NO LIE! Apparently, for a small fee, you could strap yourself into this death trap and learn to do the trapeze. No.Thank.You. Especially not after eating what would soon be coined the "Atomic Burrito". We made it back to our room to change clothes and to catch a quick breather before meeting our charges. We arrived at their room to find a WHOLE.BUNCH.OF.PEOPLE. Thank God, they weren't all staying with us. :) The three "angels" were there, totally behaving. happened. "They" arrived. These little kids walked in...Okay, so one of them, Margot, wasn't so little, but I digress. Mom walks in, dressed like she's "On at 11" and dumps two cases of bottled water and two grocery bags FULL of "healthy snacks". She obviously implies that her daughter is too heafty and she isn't to have any junk food. (By the end of the night, Kristen and I let her have like three pieces of pizza, multiple sugar free wafers and some fruit. She could sure pack it in. But hey, they were "healthy".) Margot's little brother Bo was about all I could handle. The kid SCREAMED the entire time and threw a huge fit if you even looked at him. He refused to get in the swimming pool, requiring a "big kid" to sit out with him. He was awful. After we had enough, "MOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMM!!! I WAAAAANNNNT MY MOOOOOOMMMM!" we made our way back to the room. If you think I'm kidding, I'll hurt you. He calmed down a little after the narcotics I slipped him kicked in. TOTALLY KIDDING. We gave him pizza. To kids, it's a drug. He was happy once he had smothered his slice in about 5 packets of parmesan cheese. Looked, revolting. But whatever. After some bouncing on the bed, poopy diapers, falling of the bed and hitting our noggins on the floor (on purpose), watching/screaming through Lilo & Stitch, pinching, the eating of some crayons, etc, etc...things started to wind down a little. I was sitting on the couch with Jillian, aka "Good Kid #2" and her little brother Donnie, aka "Good Kid #3". ("Good Kid #1" is Lauren and she was officially considered a "Big Kid" like Kristen and I by the end of the night because she was the only one Bo would let touch him or even look in his direction.) Donnie, is in LOVE with Reagan. He thinks they're boyfriend and girlfriend and that "She likes me a WHOOOOOOLE lot!" Yes, Donnie. She's 2. She likes you. :) It was freakin' adorable though. He wanted so badly for her to say his name that he would look at her with this expression of "do you speak any English?". "Say...D.O.N.N.I.E". This went on for a good five minutes before Margot started her own little game.
"Helmsley. *silence* Margot, who is this Richard Helmsley guy?"
"I don't know. He's dead."
*crickets chirp*
"I don't know. I saw his name on a headstone in the cemetery."

Kristen and I exchange glances of, "WTF?!"
A few seconds later, she walks up behind "Good Kid #2", touches her shoulder and says...wait for it...waiiiiit for iiiiiit...
"Are you ready to diiiiieee...?" It was the most sinister tone I have ever heard out of a six year old. NOT KIDDING!! PSYCHO SID totally asked this six year old if she was ready to DIE! I made her go sit by herself and then she kept trying to get the other kids to sit on her lap. Thank the Good Lord in Heaven her mother showed up like two mintues later. Both kids acted like everything was GRAND and they had the best time EVER. Even Bo who did nothing but scream and pinch people. Apparently that's his thing. That's how he rolls. Moments later and the "angels" parents got back. We shared with them our demon child story and they thanked us profusely for protecting their children. haha! We got paid, kissed the kiddos g'nite and Holy mackeral it was a night to remember. Shortly after going to sleep, we were awakened in shifts by torential vomiting. Thank's Los Cabos!! MUCHOS GRACIAS!

To be continued...

No comments: