I wrote a post last night (which has since been deleted) where I vented. A lot. The words are irrelevant and have since been deleted, but the comments that were left meant a lot to me. Thought I'd share and express my gratitude for the wonderful friends that I have been blessed with. I love you all!!
I understand! I know how sometimes people just say that, and really dont mean it, but I realy fully completely understand...I am always questiong grad school, my future (mate, job, life in general). I have a tendency to fall in love with people, things, places and recieve no love back. I have a need for adventure, yet obligations keep those from me..I have desires, yet reality always tends to seep in, and sometimes reality absolutely sucks!!!(BIG TIME!!)..I have no idea why this is, and why it has to happen. I think that for me, it is about this whole walk by faith thing that keeps slipping up. Who knows. I guess only God, but sometimes I wonder what He is doing up there and why I cant know the big picture now, if I did, it might make the right now a little more bearable...I love You!!!
The real key there is why the door opening and closing was your cue to go to sleep. I always thought we were just joking around when we would act asleep when someone came in. I could have been wrong though. PS, it may be hard to do, but know that you do have control over your life. There is no physical force causing you to go to school or work in the morning, it is driven otherwise. If that were the case then my life would be easier because I wouldn't have to choose what to eat at dinner, it would be chosen for me. Our paths are made, God wouldn't want to put the world into a spin and watch it, knowing exactly what every step would bring. That would be like watching Memento for a second time. Life is not serious. Life is a freakin blast. We get one life and it is ours for our making. There is NOTHING, and NO ONE, worth ruining our own lives for except for our children. That last part of that sentence is my own opinion, but whatever. There is nothing to gain from a life of wanting, because you will never ever get exactly what you want. That's another thing altogether though, us, as humans, really have no idea what we want. I may order a cheeseburger and then as soon as the waiter walks away, wish I had a taco. This is not to say that we cannot truly love or anything like that. Love is an emotion that works on a much higher love than wanting. The ones we truly love are not necessarily the ones we think we want. Usually those don't so much work out.
Life should be about always learning from everything. There is something positive to take from Everything! It doesn't matter if its hard to see, just look harder, or wait longer, it will come. Blessings should always be counted before wantings. OK, so I may have made up that word, but whatever.
I'm not 100% sure which roommate that last comment came from, but I can take a guess. :) Either way, it was appreciated and the point well taken. That is why I said that post was for me and no one else, meaning I knew it would make little to no sense to the average person. Sometimes we just need to let it out somewhere so that we don't burden our friends with the everyday stressors that is EVERYONES life. Ya know? My blogging about this stuff is nothing to ever be worried about. Journaling in one way or another has always been my release. I just feel better once I get it out. That's me! haha! One minute I'm dumping all my cosmic questions for all the internet world to see and the next? I'm telling you all about the 11 different colors I saw in the sunset and the 42 ways Reagan can melt your heart. Today is a new day...and a FRIDAY at that. The world is good, God is good...I am good. :) I love you, thank you for caring enough to comment.- Love Liz
"Do not pray for easy lives; pray to be stronger men! Do not pray for tasks equal to your powers, pray for powers equal to your tasks..." Phillips Brooks
"Any concern too small to be turned into a prayer is too small to be made into a burden"
Corrie ten Boom
"We are all worms, but I do believe I am a glowworm"
Have a glowing day!
The shortest distance between a solution and a problem is the distance between your knees and the floor. The one who kneels to the Lord can stand up to anything. Amen
-nobody loves you like i do